Just Do It.

One of the guiding principles of my life is pretty darned simple and can be summed up thus:

Someone needs help.

If it's within your power to do so, you help them out.

And that's about all there is to it.

It's hard for me understand why most people do not think the same way. Common "wisdom" (and I use that word loosely) seems to be, "You scratch my back, and I'll scratch yours." In other words, do what I want and I'll be nice to you ... otherwise, all bets are off.

Sometimes, it doesn't even matter if you're extending that person a kindness or if you are just being polite to them. They feel no obligation at all to do anything nice for you, even if it's in their power to help out. It's the same thing when people just say "it's not my job" or "it's not my worry" and go about their day, forgetting that they could have extended a kindness or given a bit of assistance, just because they can. No, it wasn't necessary or required; but would it hurt you to do it? Probably not.

This is not the kind of world that I grew up in.

I first learned my philosophy from my maternal grandmother. She's been gone for 27 years now, and I still miss her. She was a wonderful woman--ask anyone who knew her. Even today, if her name is mentioned, people will remember and relate her many kindnesses to them. She didn't have great riches or resources, but she always got the job done. She was like the widow with her mite; she gave it all. That was OK with her. It was part of her faith to do whatever she could to help someone who needed it.

When my grandmother's name is mentioned, people don't say "God rest her soul," or another similar platitude. They don't need to--they know that's exactly what He has done. She didn't rest much in this life, so I'm quite certain that God has granted her some pretty cushy rest now that she's with Him.

My mother is the same way. I believe that the first 40 years of her life were spent learning this philosophy from my grandma. The second 40 years she has put it into action. Helping and taking care of people who needed what she could give them has been a way of life for her. And like my grandmother, when people talk about my mom, they are quick to talk about all that she has done for others, often neglecting herself in the process. Thankfully, the last few years, Mom has been able to do things her way. But "her way" usually ends up meaning she continues to find little things she can do for other people. It's part of her soul.

I should be so fortunate as to be remembered like these two women who have so deeply influenced the person I am today. I have this problem with good intentions, where I mean to do something nice and then forget until it seems too late. But I resolve to do the right thing "next time." 

Luckily, most of the time I am surrounded by people who are thoughtful, kind and respectful. If they happen to forget, I don't mind telling them that they could extend a kindness and they are usually pretty receptive to my not-so-subtle reminders. Hey, I forget too sometimes. And I don't mind too much if someone gives me a little nudge to help me remember what I ought to do, because it's what I want to do. In fact, I hope they do nudge me when I forget about my good intentions :-)

A friend of mine, Austen, writes a blog as part of his job at a newspaper, and last winter he wrote a great piece that illustrates some of what I am trying to say, called "The Lost Art of Manners." I was really impressed by his thinking. Obviously, most people wouldn't have given this lady a second thought. Especially most people his age, which is 30. Not only did Austen give her a second thought, he actually acted on it. And it made me feel good to read about it.

So, today I ask you to take the time to think about others. And don't just think about it--act on it. Please. Just do it.